Creativity Is All There Is: A Ten Day Immersion of the Self
Excerpt from Immersion Darshan by Igor Kufayev
The way of living a creative life is when we are, from time to time, encountering this not knowing where we’re going, not knowing what we’re doing, not knowing what the heck is going on—because these are all marks of a creative being. You cannot be creative and be knowing it all. I would like to have that permission to speak about these matters. I would like to be inspired, to share with all of you the deepest passion that I have always pursued from as early as I remember myself; because if I can share that, then this time is not wasted.
Creativity is all there is. The whole point of life is to be in a creative state. And I even mentioned very recently: one of the surest tests of finding out where we are, how we are doing, is to simply sense whether we feel creative. This is the only test of how conscious we are. In fact, we can switch or change, if you will, the spiritual discourse and language which is being utilized, and use it slightly differently. Instead of speaking about how aware we are, how conscious we are, we could say how creative we are—it’s equal. It’s not only synonymous, here: it means the same thing. And again, just as when we speak about “What does it mean to be conscious? What does it mean to be fully conscious or conscious to the fuller capacity?” it in turn, implies being free from what imposes that in the first place, being free from these impositions. It’s the same with creativity. Being creative is being free of impositions. It’s as simple as that. And that also, at the very same time, presupposes from time to time, being lost; because when you’re not lost, you’re not adjusting anything…
Being lost means you will find your way—you will find a better way. You will find a more evolved way of being. Only when we feel lost, we can find something. If we don’t feel lost, if we think everything is nice and dandy—we are cool and fluffy—nothing can change. So that’s the first take at it—it’s an invitation to welcome that. I welcome you to that place which at times will feel also uncomfortable. It will feel uncomfortable.
I know it’s easy for me to give these examples in a more tangible, tactile way as a painter, and that may fall flat for you as examples because you may say “Well, I’m sorry, I don’t paint. I don’t make things with my hands—I don’t relate to that.” But you can transfer that into any area of your life. You can find analogy to that. Whenever we are about to create something, we are in a special state. In that moment, we don’t know what we’re going to create—this will come later. That’s the next step, the next phase. In that state of the Unknown, there’s a lot of creativity. It’s being simply swelled. And in essence, it’s very hard to put your finger on what that is.
In that more creative, more opened state and place, you have much greater capacity to express yourself. Not that I want you immediately to latch onto that. I would like, in fact—if circumstances of life can afford it—for you to savor it for however much longer, and then you will see how life will present you with extraordinary opportunities.
Whenever there is more of that creativity, there’s more of that which belongs to the field of Pure Potentialities. When we know where we’re going, our actual possibilities are already limited there and then. When we know exactly what we want and are going there—which has its own value of course—it is already limited there and then. The possibilities are limited because you limited them yourself. But in a state of not-knowing, it’s as if you’re inviting a lot more of what can happen.
This state of creativity is inseparable from not-knowing; and out of that not-knowing, that creative state, it naturally translates into action where it begins to then flow in a certain direction. Then we are prompted to act on it and we begin to express ourselves. And this is the most important. The most important thing is to remain in that molten state of being creative at all times; it has to be fostered, honed.
– Igor Kufayev, excerpt from Darshan during the 10-day immersion at Modernes Kloster, Gut Saunstorf, Germany. July, 2022
“On the third day of meditation something happened. I went really deep inside myself and discovered pure peace and silence. I could not move anymore because I completely dissolved in that all-embracing, being totally one with everything. It was a really beautiful experience – now still it gives me shivers. Also, in the heart meditation, all my life-energy went into my heart and a strong feeling of total opening appeared. Inside this heart was a transparent white pearl looking like a water drop reflecting the world, and inside of it, pure energy and silence. That drop came and submerged with the moving flow around it, and these two energies, the moving one and the silent one, became one. Just oneness, nothing else. It was the most intensive state I have ever experienced and there is nothing in this wonderful, beautiful, moving play of the world that can be compared to that state. I want to say thank you every day for this – thank you that I got that honor to know and experience this state: it is always there, and I can sometimes find it in myself, even at home; it is the greatest gift I have ever received in life. For this gift I am so grateful – I want to fall down on my knees and bow to life and the circumstances that led me to Vamadeva.”
“The bliss tasted during the first six days of the immersion kept growing with each day and reached inexpressible levels that I didn’t even realise my body was capable of withstanding. It spilled over outside of the meditations to such a degree, that I couldn’t help but smile and laugh when I walked through the trees and felt them reverberating inside my own heart. The transcendent bliss has lessened since the immersion, but it has left a sweet, soft contentment deep in the center of my heart. One that I cannot aptly put into words or find any discernible reason for, but continues to make my whole being smile every day, even amidst the chaos of urban householder life.”
The post immersion days culminated in a glorious Full Moon on July 13th, the revered celebration of Guru Purnima. For the first time ever, The Team was able to share in a humble ceremony honoring Divine Inheritance, Our Teacher, The Teachers’ Teachers… The Only Principle. Perennial bows to The Spiritual Masters across time for the endless vigilance. A sacred vigilance, carrying the flame of eternity from heart to heart…
We are grateful to share this experience with you.
And here are personal reflections shared by Vamadeva to his Team, days after the immersion, of how he perceived the immensity of the time spent together:
“…The reason why it took me so long to come up with anything, to be able to draw something on what we all went through, is because I still am struggling to find the fitting words, the words that would adequately convey, not necessarily describe but just convey, the immensity of what this latest immersion presented itself. And of course, I don’t want to kind of over dramatize—we can always use all these terms, and we’ve used them before: ‘Oh that was an amazing one!’ or ‘That was an epic time!’ or ‘That was an incredibly powerful…’. We’ve used all these terms over the years. I can of course dig in and pull some of those words in trying to describe what this last time together as that gathering was for me personally, and how I have perceived it in terms of the quality of that time together.
So surely this was indeed one of the very rare events. I could almost count on one hand immersions of the past 10 years that had this quality to them. And I’m not talking about the sheer intensity, because we had more powerful immersions in terms of its display. We also had our own very, very subtle and very, very refined times together as in the advanced course here on the island [of Mallorca] in the Autumn of 2019—many of you remember that of course. But there was something indeed that has transpired or been brought out to the surface during this last one that I’m still processing deeply.
My heart is still very much steeped in that. And as some of your feedback that was shared also confirms that which I have experienced myself. To begin with, in order to be able to bring that theme out, I have decided to become the very, very kernel or the very axis of the immersion itself, which required not only a realignment of all the forces within myself but also to allow something to be molten yet again. And, to speak about creativity, which is very dear to me as a topic, as a subject, something else had to be accessed. I couldn’t just speak about it from the place that maybe would have been a much safer territory, but I had to touch that, knowing that it would cost a tremendous experience of yet another deep heart opening, at the level where one runs the risks of course, many risks. I don’t want to begin to go into this and analyze that—I’m not at that stage yet. But to draw that out, and to allow that to be spoken, had to be at the expense of that something. Something within myself that had to be sacrificed.
I know it may all sound a bit too… in Russian we say vysokoparnyy, too highly spoken, too much pathos in that—but no. It’s very down to earth, very simple. I’m still recovering from it—that’s the truth. Recovering in the sense of recovering that what had to be gone through. So I don’t know how the teaching will proceed from here, but I know a certain threshold has been reached from where potentially an entirely new different kind of teaching will rise.
So I thought I will relate this to you first and foremost, and leave you with that. We will begin to share all this what we went through now, as a team, with you and with the others. But I thought to relate this message directly in this manner, as intimately as I could possibly do…”
– Igor Kufayev, Sant Joan, Mallorca, Spain. July 27, 2022
Our next 10-Day Immersion with Igor Vamadeva is around the corner and will be held at Gut Saunstorf, in Germany, from July 13th-23rd, 2023. In this program, Vamadeva will continue to explore the theme of beauty and creativity, which was initiated right here in Germany. If you feel the calling to join us and immerse yourself in this work of Grace, we welcome you with open hearts: https://www.igorkufayev.com/gut-saunstorf-10-day-2023-booking
Photos taken at the 10-day Immersion with Igor Vamadeva at Modern Monastery, Gut Saunstorf, Germany, July 1-10, 2022. Courtesy of Flowing Wakefulness.